Ok..here are the old jokes transfered from wotmania. I have numbered them so its easier to read.
Joke 1
Date: Family medicine posting
Place: KKS teaching room
Incident: R, a student was examining the knee of a patient who was wearing jeans. The lecturer asked the patient to lie down behind the screen.
lecturer: R, what should we do to examine this patient?
R: we should expose his leg fully.
Lecturer: Good, and how do we do that?
R: take off his pants?
lecturer: yes...go on.
R: you want me to take off his pants? I don't know how lah. They never taught us how to in Bukit Jalil.
Joke 2
Date: Surgical Posting week 2
Place: Endoscope room
Situation: Initiation of insertion of colonoscope.
Mr Paul: R, do you know how to look for the hole?
R: No sir, i don't know lah.
Mr Paul: Then you can never be a real man.
Joke 3
Date: Surgical Posting week 3
Place: Ward 3B Seremban GH
Incident: Bed-side teaching with Mr Shaker. Comment on colour of the patient's face.
Mr Shaker: What is the colour between red and pink?
R: Blue
Mr Shaker: I'll kill you....
Joke 4
Date: Surgical posting week 3
Place: TBL room IMU
Incident: Mr Ramesh was describing a kind of needle used in aspiration called 'Large-needle aspiration'.
R: I don't understand, Doctor, how is it different?
Mr Ramesh: Its bigger...
R: Oh, i see....the syringe is bigger
Mr Ramesh: .....
Joke 5
Date: Surgical Posting, Week 4
Place: Seminar room, IMU
Incident: TBL, R is talking about post-trauma care
R:....and one of the most important things we need to do is to teach the patient how to start breathing.....
Joke 6
Date: Surgical Posting Week 5
Place: Ward 3b, Seremban GH
Incident: BST with Mr Sudirman. S, was inspecting the abdomen of a male patient. While commenting on the fact that the umbilicus was inverted....
S:....the abdomen is not distended...and the nipple is inverted....
Mr Sudir: What? nipple?
S:...the nipple is inverted...
Mr Sudir: (looks blank)
S:...nipple? inverted?...
Everyone: (giggles)
S:...Oh,Opps, i mean umbilicus....last night i was studying breasts......
Joke 7
Place: Ward 3a, Seremban GH
Date: Surgical Posting, Week 5
Incident: BST with Dato Kanda ( Yes, contrary to what everyone think...it is possible to have funny incidents during his class)
Dato: In what condition will we have UTI?
Student: Poor Hygiene
Dato: What do you mean by poor hygiene? What is good Hygiene?
Student: Washing that area everyday
Dato: Does that mean all those people who does not wash everyday will get UTI?....what about those people in the jungles?... and those people who climb everest...they cannot wash everyday.....they all have UTI?
Rama is sitting next to me now and saying reocrding everthing he say is not good for his 'biological development'. I say its good for ours...muahahaaaaa....
Joke 8
Place: TBL room, IMU
Date: Surgical Posting, week 5
Incident: R is presenting a case
R: The patient claim to have haemorrhoids five months ago...
Student: 'claims'? How you know its true?
R: Of course claim lah....You think i saw his backside 5 months ago?
Joke 9
Time : 1 pm
Place : SOPD
Dr Ruslan, an MO in SOPD was working routinely while being watched by 2 'observant' students full of enthusiasm. At the end of the session...
Dr : So any questions?
H : Dr, what does BO stand for?
Dr : BO is bowel opening, so what's PU then?
R : Penile opening!(so confidently answered after hearing the word PO instead of PU)
Dr : Passing urine la...(laughing)...that's quite a good one huh...(still laughing)
Joke 10
Date: Internal Med Posting, Week 1
Place: Seremban GH
Incident: Comment by an internal med doctor
Doctor: A surgeon and his residents were on their way out of a building. The elevator started to close so the surgeon stuck his head out and stopped the door from closing. His residents said " But Sir, why didn't you use your hands?" The surgeon replied, "I need them for my work"
Joke 11
Date: Internal Medicine posting, week 1
Place: Seminar room, IMU
Incident: The air-conditioning in the seminar room have proved too much for some of our collegues. Overhead during a TBL...
Student 1: Is the aircon reducible?
Student 2: No....there is also no cough impulse.
Student 1: ????
Joke 12
Date: Surgical Posting, week 5
Place: seminar room, IMU
Incident: Prof ramesh and the breast examnination
Prof: How far do we expose the patient?
Student: From the neck to the abdomen
Prof: ..so we cover the patient's head?
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